I've been thinking about something for awhile now. When I say this to my husband, he gets very nervous. :) I've probably overtalked it to him so now I'm voicing it to a different audience. I haven't got it all figured out, and I feel like it will take me awhile before I do. It's the whole concept of friendships.
You always hear about how there are different friends for different seasons in your life. Totally get it. So...what are friendships supposed to be like when you're in your mid-30's, work, clean, cook, and stay busy with three kids and all that goes with it? How do you find the time to work on the friendships in your life that have depth and meaning? How do you let go of the ones that aren't really worth hanging on to? How do you find quality ones when you are put into new scenarios in life?
I have to admit-sometimes I feel like I fit in everywhere, and yet I don't fit in anywhere. I can be surrounded by people and yet feel totally and utterly alone. I have many friends, and yet when I get a rare opportunity to shop or get a pedicure...it's usually by myself.
I look back (that makes me feel old to say that) and look around me now and see so many different kinds of friendships in my life. And really, it's probably a sampling of the friendships we all have in life....
...the college friends who you will love forever. They get you and you get them. No matter the changes in life or the distance between you, it takes one phone call or one email, and bam...you pick up where you left off. And it is oh so good. And oh so far away.
...the couple that you bond with (we like both of them!!!) and feel an instant connection. Kids play well, you love getting together...and then they move away. The ache when they leave-it never really leaves. Long distance relationships are hard but totally worth it.
...the fun person who is married to a dud. Admit it, you all have one of those in your life. You can get together one-on-one but the couple thing isn't really happening.
...the friend who is a little too judgmental, or too opinionated, or too negative, or too materialistic, or too holy. Lots to like but slightly irritating too.
...the friend that your inner gut tells you they are probably badmouthing you behind your back. You think you're crazy for thinking it, but you are probably not.
...the friend who is popular and has lots of other close friends so you don't want to stalk them because you really really like them but don't want to appear too desperate to hang out.
...the friend who is closer friends with your other friend but yet the three of you don't really hang out together. Kinda awkward.
...the friend who thinks your husband is a little weird or off the wall or loud. They invite you out for coffee, but you don't get invited to the couples kind of thing. Goes both ways, I guess. Whatever. He's a rockstar.
...the friend who you really like and would love to be closer to, but they keep you at arm's length.
Can anyone relate?!? At the end of the day, I sometimes think...how many of my friends can I be totally real with? That I can cry to (like the rare ugly cry) and be gut-level honest with. For many of us, we have a spouse that is our best friend. They have seen the good, the bad, and the ugly and still love us no matter what. But sometimes you need that girlfriend to go shopping with, get a pedicure with, talk about Grey's Anatomy with (seriously...the plane crash was sad), talk about mothering failures, and how you want to be a better person. Not quite the hubby's territory.
I have an awesome husband, an awesome mom, and a handful of awesome friends that have my back and love me for me. I couldn't do life without them. But I'm not sure at this phase in life, (when your personal stuff sometimes takes a backseat), how do you start new friendships, maintain close ones, and grow them deeper? Like I said....I've been thinking about something for awhile now.
Thursday, November 15, 2012
A Bit Rusty Over Here
Well, blogging in 2012 was a fail, wasn't it? I should've been better at it. Somehow it's just easier to make a quick post on Facebook and run with it. I could give you a few dozen excuses, but I won't. Cause then I'd have to admit that one of them is me watching too much TV after the kids go to bed. :) I like a few shows....yes, I can be shallow and boring like that.
I did the unthinkable just now and sat down in the middle of the day. I now have two kids vying for my attention in a most disobedient kind of way. Well, I shall return and post a little more when I can. I'm thinking that my goal for the new year will be to post on here once a day...I wonder if I can live up to that challenge. Hmm...
I did the unthinkable just now and sat down in the middle of the day. I now have two kids vying for my attention in a most disobedient kind of way. Well, I shall return and post a little more when I can. I'm thinking that my goal for the new year will be to post on here once a day...I wonder if I can live up to that challenge. Hmm...
Friday, April 27, 2012
The Big Blue Blessing
I packed away the high chair this week. Scrubbed it down, washed the cushion and straps, and put it all away. Probably for the last time. (My sweet Hannah has officially graduated to the booster seat.) I felt so sentimental about the whole thing. Then I felt silly about being sentimental.
Granted, it is just a big ol' blue high chair. But it is a piece of our life that has seen many a fun moment. It's in the baby pictures of the kiddos covered in spaghetti. It's in the birthday pictures of them eating cake and celebrating their big day. It held them many an evening when we ate dinner together as a family. And most importantly, it is a simple reminder to me that God always provides.
Back when Abby was about 4 months old, we were living in West Haven and living on a strict budget. Jason and I were in the throes of the Dave Ramsey Debt Snowball while we each were working full-time and learning how to be parents for the first time. When Abby was ready to start eating some solid foods, we realized we didn't have a high chair. And we didn't have the money for one. A very nice coworker of mine gave us an old high chair that she had. Free, but old. And it didn't have straps on it or the middle leg divider (what do you call that thing that goes between the legs and keeps them in place?). Anywhoo...first time in the high chair Abby almost slid out of it in 2 minutes flat. One minute she's sitting there checking out her new digs, and the next minute her head has disappeared! She had slid all the way down to where her head was where her butt should have been. A minor freak out. So it was free, but no good. I remember Jason and I talking aboout it and not really knowing where the extra money was going to come from. So you say a little prayer under your breath and keep on keepin' on. The very next day, I checked the mail, and we had the most random envelope from Oklahoma that day. When we opened it, there was a check for $75 from our old insurance company. We had moved a year and half earlier, but they had just realized we had an overage on our closed account and sent us a check. It still gives me goosebumps to think about it. We did a happy Jesus dance right there in the kitchen! Time to buy a high chair!
I headed off to Babies R Us to see what $75 could get me. I was still a little freaked about Abby sliding out of the used high chair, so we were going with a new one this time! And easily enough, I found our big blue high chair for $73 and change. Said a little "Hallejuah! Thank you Jesus!" right there in BRU and took it home with us. And it's been with us ever since...other than loaning it out to a friend whose two little boys enjoyed it when mine weren't.
So, cleaning the ol' high chair this week (a little beat up and bruised and missing a few parts), I was reminded of how special we are to Him.
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
-Matthew 6:25-34 NIV
Granted, it is just a big ol' blue high chair. But it is a piece of our life that has seen many a fun moment. It's in the baby pictures of the kiddos covered in spaghetti. It's in the birthday pictures of them eating cake and celebrating their big day. It held them many an evening when we ate dinner together as a family. And most importantly, it is a simple reminder to me that God always provides.
Back when Abby was about 4 months old, we were living in West Haven and living on a strict budget. Jason and I were in the throes of the Dave Ramsey Debt Snowball while we each were working full-time and learning how to be parents for the first time. When Abby was ready to start eating some solid foods, we realized we didn't have a high chair. And we didn't have the money for one. A very nice coworker of mine gave us an old high chair that she had. Free, but old. And it didn't have straps on it or the middle leg divider (what do you call that thing that goes between the legs and keeps them in place?). Anywhoo...first time in the high chair Abby almost slid out of it in 2 minutes flat. One minute she's sitting there checking out her new digs, and the next minute her head has disappeared! She had slid all the way down to where her head was where her butt should have been. A minor freak out. So it was free, but no good. I remember Jason and I talking aboout it and not really knowing where the extra money was going to come from. So you say a little prayer under your breath and keep on keepin' on. The very next day, I checked the mail, and we had the most random envelope from Oklahoma that day. When we opened it, there was a check for $75 from our old insurance company. We had moved a year and half earlier, but they had just realized we had an overage on our closed account and sent us a check. It still gives me goosebumps to think about it. We did a happy Jesus dance right there in the kitchen! Time to buy a high chair!
I headed off to Babies R Us to see what $75 could get me. I was still a little freaked about Abby sliding out of the used high chair, so we were going with a new one this time! And easily enough, I found our big blue high chair for $73 and change. Said a little "Hallejuah! Thank you Jesus!" right there in BRU and took it home with us. And it's been with us ever since...other than loaning it out to a friend whose two little boys enjoyed it when mine weren't.
So, cleaning the ol' high chair this week (a little beat up and bruised and missing a few parts), I was reminded of how special we are to Him.
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
-Matthew 6:25-34 NIV
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)